19th October.
This morning’s Tabloid has the picture of a new born baby gorilla sleeping soundly on his mother’s chest, in a zoo in Rotterdam, Holland. More than the blissful look on the infant’s face, what caught my attention was the mother gorilla’s expression. It has that indulgent, serene and a complacent look which only a mother can sport. Last week there was a write up on the latest venture on explaining Mona Lisa’s smile. The researcher alleges that the model had very recently become a mother, and that a very thin veil that covered her (?) visible only after a thorough scrutiny, corroborated his theory. The expression on her face reflected her inner glow as a ‘new’ mother.
Like the female gorilla and Mona Lisa, every woman’s face takes on that expression when they beget children. Some of them learn to camouflage it ( for reasons best known to them).
Twenty one years back my face got that expression when I was elevated to ‘double- motherhood’ by the arrival of my twin sons….jointly referred to as Kath-Kash by our friends in Bhilai. The thing is, that expression has never been wiped off from my face! They say it is difficult to bring up kids. They say it is next to impossible to raise twins. Challenging? Yes….. Impossible? No! I have enjoyed the last 21 special years as I grew up as a mother with them. Every stage has been a wonderful learning experience.
I had delivered them in the seventh month of my pregnancy and had to watch over them eagle-eyed for the next three months. That I had the expert presence of my mom, mum-in – law, Grandma , a contingent of aunts and last but not the least, my younger sister, had helped a lot. But, there are moments, incidents, and milestones that are exclusively mine.
There was a time when I watched them with helpless tears- of frustration- when the one year old twins excluded me from their world, preferring their own company. They’d just approach me when they were hungry or needed me to change their nappies. The rest of the time they jabbered away in some special language of their own, laughing, discussing, fighting and never sparing a glance for me. Horrified that I was doing some wrong parenting, I had consulted many paediatricians who consoled me saying that it was a natural occurring. Twins had a special world of their own, which no one can trespass into- not even the mother. That took some accepting!
I have given it my best shot to not compare or contrast one with the other. There is no question of my loving one more than the other. My heart has ached, when in their course of life, others have done that- compared or commented on their achievements, or temperaments or their decisions. I know they have a deep bond that defies all logical reasoning and all attempts at analyzing their attitudes and aptitudes by outsiders.
I remember one incident that brings back the tears of pride that welled up in my eyes and heart, when they were six years old. They both were very keen budding artists and used to participate in competitions. Both of them won prizes in a painting competition sponsored by Camlin Colour Company, in Bhilai. One got the first and the other, a consolation prize. One accepted a certificate and two big gift- wrapped parcels with aplomb and happily joined us, the proud parents. The consolation prize winner was called and given just a certificate. The child lingered there thinking that he too would be given a wrapped- up gift. But he was gently ushered down the stage by someone. My heart bled the way only a mother’s can at the woebegone look on his face as he joined us. But my faith in my kids’ bonding was restored permanently, when, the one who had got two gifts told the other loudly, ‘ K! I have 2 gifts with me. Here, you take one,’ and handed one of his prizes to his twin. I cried and cried shamelessly then in that hall. God bless them both for that cherished memory that makes any physical pain I might have undergone while delivering them, well worth it!
They are great kids…. The best a mother could ever aspire to have. Adding a long string of such fond memories to my treasure chest, they have now grown up into fine young men. Anyone who has interacted with them has certified them as good kids. I only hope they get two wonderful girls as their life partners who will not mind my wearing that smug, serene and ‘overflowing with motherly love’ look, like that of that gorilla in the Rotterdam zoo, and Mona Lisa!
No comments:
Post a Comment